I have been feeling tired, depressed even exhausted for a long time. It isnt easy to stand indeed. Two boys with too many problems! The adolescent one is also sometimes being unbearable!.
Mum and dad are too old. There is always something to do about their health care. Hospital visits, doctor appointments, and things to do to get their meds. Not the to do lists but the thing that I should always be patient, understanding, caring and serving all the time is really irritating and tiring.
I envy other parents. I blame myself and I try to find a reasonable answer to what I had done to mislead the way while bringing up the children. Why not they are helpful and why not they stand by me instead of being so insensitive about what is going on in the house. They never think that is too much for me.
No personal future hopes at all. When a day comes to an end, I thank God for giving me the strength to handle the circumstances.
Let alone the routine, I sometimes feel as if my son doesnt recover well. Because at times he utters some words like flashbacks from his hardest times.
But the therapy really works. Two days ago he had another appointment with the doctor. It is now obvious that he really changes the way my son thinks. No matter how long the process is,
He now seems to get rid of the thoughts those do not match the real life of us.
He is being a little bit more sensitive as well