It is now precisely certain that he wont be able to work or to take a responsibility all his life long.
I could do nothing else but help him start the gym. I hope it will lessen his pain. It seems that we should learn to lead a life with the circumstances we are in.
What is pleasing now is that he has been leading a steady life for a few days. He doesnt take the car very often and gets by with a little money.
He doesnt speak too much. He is a bit like féeling guilty about his incompetence, I think. This is also saddening for me as a mum.
Tonight he stayed at home!
He is silent, very silent. Once he tried to speak but again about his dreams. I did cut it short because the more he talks about his made up stories, the more he strengthens his disbeliefs.
Tonight one of my old students called me and said he could help my son with an engineering job vacancy. But I rejected because I knew for certain what could happen in the end if he applied for the job. Even if he started, he would quit the job again as he would think that it is fake again.
My student had helped us once again last year. Although his situation wasnt that bad, the interview hadnt gone well, either. That is why I had better not attempt once again for such kind of things, at least until he gets well.
You see, I still havent lost my hope. I still want to believe that he will recover from these ill thoughts.
Hope is a nice thing that even if it leaves you, it returns back from time to time. Otherwise no one can survive in such a whirlpool.